some people age, they begin to lose a certain degree of excitement
about simple life experiences like snow days, finding a penny in a
parking lot or putting on a pair of fresh underwear still warm from
the dryer. But not me! I revel in these moments, probably because
I still feel like a kid a heart-at least until my hair stylist breaks
out her lawn equipment to trim my eyebrows.
In these trying times when the American political system resembles
a disturbing bonus episode of "Tiger King," it's important to seek
solace in the basic pleasures of life. What follows are a few intentional
strategies I use to get my mind on something other than the unattended
daycare center that is the current U.S. government.
Spending quality time with family is a great way to focus one's attention
on more wholesome matters. For me, this means hanging out with my
wife and three teen daughters-when they can fit me in. These days,
time with my daughters is often encroached upon by boyfriends, iPhones,
and other household pests. In fact, one of my daughters just recently
had a visit from a young man who parked his Porsche in front of our
house. I immediately felt like the dad in every 1980'S teen movie
I've ever seen. (Ah, the 1980's, when politics were simpler, the economy
was booming, and all we had to worry about was the constant threat
of nuclear holocaust.)
We also go on occasional family outings, where I almost always find
myself loitering around the entrances to numerous women's clothing
boutiques like some creepy, masked goober, and then waiting in line
for expensive coffee beverages that I don't want. But, hey, at least
we're together-sort of.
Another effective diversion from the antics of American government
officials is enjoying our household pets, who-unlike most politicians-are
generally housebroken. We had some extra-special doggie fun a couple
of weeks ago when several inches of snow fell in East Texas, which
is about as common in these parts as an untouched serving of tortilla
chips and queso.
When we first ventured out into the weather, our two little doglets
stood paralyzed with humiliation in their brand new plush hoodies,
designed to keep them warm-but with strategically-placed openings
to allow them the freedom to kill the grass and soil my footwear.
Once we relieved them of their embarrassing threads, though, they
contracted a raging case of the "zoomies," eagerly raced around the
snow-blanketed yard and promptly sabotaged my snow boots.
Finally, and most importantly, I avoid political migraines by nurturing
my spiritual life. After all, the Lord has seen me through much more
traumatic situations-like junior high. And speaking of junior high,
I am currently teaching a seventh-grade boys Sunday school class.
If you think the American government is a worrisome embarrassment,
try discussing the biblical miracle of Balaam's talking "ass" with
a group of prepubescent boys. (Some kid always shows up with the King
Regardless of your political persuasion, I think we can all agree
that there are more important things in life than whatever happens
to be grating Don Lemon's or Sean Hannity's cheese at any given moment.
The world of American politics is a toxic-waste dumpster fire right
now, but we'll survive it. That's what Americans do. In the meantime,
let's all say a prayer, love on our families, play with our pets,
and grab a fresh pair of warm undies from the dryer.