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Father’s
Day by
Peary Perry | |
Here
we go with Father’s day again. I don’t know about you but I’m still stuck in March
and I’m having a hard time bringing myself around to thinking about summer being
here this soon. But whether I like it or not, time waits for no man, much less
me, so I had best get with it.
For those of you with fathers, take time
out this coming Sunday to do something special for him. I was with one of my sons
last weekend and we got to talking about how quickly time goes by. We were comparing
dates in my life as compared to dates in his. You know how you do; you look back
twenty or thirty years and begin to realize how quickly time goes by. In order
for a couple of things to happen in his life and for me to still be around to
see them, I will have to live to be somewhere around 110 years old. Might be hard
to do.
This week one of my good friends died so someone lost a father,
husband and a brother. Then another of my friends lost his 23 year old son. So,
having had eye surgery and getting ready for knee surgery next week doesn’t seem
so bad for me. I am very fortunate.
There are a lot of things I would have
liked to have asked my father, but was too dumb to think of while he was alive.
Somehow I guess I thought he would always be around and when he wasn’t, well,
it was too late to do anything about it. I hope you don’t make that same mistake.
Ask questions while they are still around to give you the answers.
My
wife always wants to know why I get so quiet when my sons are in the house. It’s
mainly because I love to listen to them talk. They aren’t kids anymore; they are
all grown men and have their own issues and concerns over their lives and our
social issues. I like hearing their opinions. I am well past the stage where I
need a tie or a new pair of house shoes. I just want some time with my boys to
hear their hearts. Our lives pass by so quickly that it is too sad that we look
around and wonder what happened and often times its too late. For father as well
as son.
Life is a funny thing, most of us choose to save only the good
memories and toss away the bad ones. We often refer to ‘the good old days’ when
in reality those might have been some of the toughest days of our lives, but we
gloss over the hardships and focus on the good parts. Those ties and slippers
will wear out or go out of style, but good relationships are never going to be
tossed away. All of us remember that song that Cat Stevens came out with years
ago called… “The Cats in the Cradle” …..to me it was one of the saddest songs
I’ve ever heard. The son had grown up just like the dad and didn’t have time for
their relationship any longer.
All of us have busy lives, it seems the
older we get, the more so. I don’t where the time goes each day, I find myself
still trying to get things done late in the afternoons when I should have been
finished hours ago. I do know one thing and that is… I value the time I get to
spend with my boys, whether it’s in person or on the phone. I know they have things
to do as well and their time is just as valuable, but I also know that the clock
is running and I won’t be here at some point in the future to answer those questions.
That’s why today is important for me to make myself available. This Sunday its
important for you to do so as well…call your dad or if you can’t do so, then make
time for your children. Listen to their hearts and answer those questions while
you can.
The spring times of our lives past quickly into the fall and winter
before we even begin to notice it.
© Peary Perry
Comments go to pperry@austin.rr.com
Letters From North America
- June 17, 2009 column
Syndicated weekly in 80 newspapers
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