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The Church
Lady
"Sister" Agnes
Dalrymple |
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Agnes
comes to us from (indirectly) from Knickerbocker,
Texas. Knickerbocker is a community in Irion
County that was once known for raising and exporting outlaws.
She moved to Knickerbocker from Langtry
after her husband Angus killed himself. His Doctor had told him he
had a bad case of trichinosis (after eating several helpings of Judge
Roy Bean's pet bear who had just died of lead poisoning). The
good doctor (when sober) said that he had meant to say "halitosis"
but the late correction didn't do Angus any good.
After burying Angus in a narrow grave on the lone prairie, not far
from the streets of Laredo,
Agnes went to live with her daughter Maypearl who had married into
a family of semi-desperate criminals. Having outlaws for in-laws didn't
intimidate Agnes a whit. She derived strength from the fact that she
was a devout Southern Pedestrian and the former chairperson of The
Langtry Lady Vigilantes. Shortly after she walked into Knickerbocker
- the bad element rode off.
With the departure of the shiftless, no-account and ne'er-do-well
population of Knickerbocker, the remaining citizens developed hobbies,
joined fitness clubs and got in touch with their inner-children.
Agnes enrolled in an Ecclesiastical Architecture correspondence course
from Mentone State University.
Although she failed the course because she couldn't read or write,
Agnes developed a deep appreciation of Texas
churches from her textbook illustrations. She spearheaded the
drive to restore the often-visited Church of the Worthless Miracle
at Fort Godbehere.
Agnes has cheerfully agreed to choose the churches we feature here
- in her contribution to Texas Escapes.
See you in church.
Although Sister Agnes is fictional - it doesn't stop her from saying
that Texas Churches are and have been the "firewall" that has kept
Texas from spontaneously combusting due to its proximity to Hell.
Our coverage of Texas churches is non-denominational and churches
appear as we come across them - mostly for their historic reference
or the workmanship of their construction. - Editor
See Churches
Across Texas
© John
Troesser
May 2002 |
| Texas
Escapes, in its purpose to preserve historic, endangered and vanishing
Texas, asks that anyone wishing to share their local history, stories,
landmarks and recent or vintage photos, please contact
us. |
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